Best is yet to come and babe, won't that be fine?
You think you've seen the sun, but you ain't seen it shine.
It's been a fantastic first year. I can honestly say I have never felt so excited for the future and so grateful for the past. Things are good. God is great. Patience is always necessary and love is always the winner.
Our first year? It wasn't always fun. Fantastic, but not always fun.
We got married. We house sat for a family in Moultonborough, NH for 2 weeks while we waited for the availability of our living space in NC. Life was calm and quiet. Things seemed slow and on the edge of beginning. Looking back, these observations couldn't have been more spot on.
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| Did we mention the house sitting involved killing herds of bugs that managed to creep inside at every opportunity? No flyswatter. Points to Jacob. |
We drove the night before Halloween straight through to Mills River, NC to spend the night with Jacob's family- arriving at the lively hour of 5am. God was good- at least we made it safely in my 14 year old car!
The next day we had a NC wedding reception- complete with flag football and dumbbells for wedding gifts. Its true. That night, we packed up our car to finally head over to our temporary NC home where we would be staying for the next 2 and a half months. We pulled out... only to realize we had a flat.
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| My realistic depiction of our unfortunate turn of events. |
Flat, as in squished and perfectly smothered into the pavement flat. We had to quickly move all necessities to one of the Clifton vans (in the cold wind and falling snow, of course), and drive off to our new home... our drafty, very cold new home. At 9PM.
And we had no sponge. Everyone needs a sponge. And why was it so darn cold?
Right away, Jacob was off to work that week in the hefty and industrious field of "lumber jacking" as well dubbed it. It would be temporary in order to simply get us through until we moved to Arizona for Jacob's Edward Jones training.
We would wake up at 6:30am. I would hurriedly fix Jacob breakfast. We would enjoy 10 minutes together in front of the space heater to warm our toes, and off he went at 7am sharp, not to return until 6:30 that night.
After he left, I put on moccasins and cleaned the house to 50's rock and roll. Why was it so darn cold?
The work hours were long. My hours alone felt longer. But we had to wait. In a few months, we would be headed to sunny Arizona for Jacob's job training for Edward Jones. We would be gone for 6 months, then return to NH where I still had a job of teaching martial arts. A job on hold, of course.
Budgets were thin. Cooking in lots of water made everything seem like it would stick to your ribs better.
You know it's a hard knock life when you start comparing the prices of beans... all of which are under a dollar.
I kept myself busy by working out a lot. Always after breakfast when your stomach was nice and full. I would practice nunchucks for an hour somedays. Other days I would walk around in the fall sun as I waited for Jacob to come home.
When Jacob did come home, despite being beat from a long day of physical labor, he would work out and I would cheer him on, sometimes joining him.
My heartsick seperation from martial arts caused me to suggest an afterschool martial arts program for the local homeschool families. With Jacob's mom helping to set up sign up info and coordinate reaching parents, we settled on having a 14 student slot per class. We ended up with 18 students in the junior class, and 16 in the teen class. Taught in a church recreation hall with no gear, no mirrors, and no mats, I felt extremely proud of the students that came out and tried martial arts for the first time.
As Christmas got closer, Jacob came down with a terrible cold (not to mention he was covered in poison ivy as well). After toughing it through work despite not being able to even talk, he finally collapsed and couldn't get out of bed. Work would be impossible the next day. It also became a sudden realization that Jacob was not going to be able to graduation TESC in time to make the winter training session for EJ in Arizona. He was devastated.
On top of all this, the "lumber jacking" work ended abruptly. We had no means, no plans, and no idea what was next. Jacob would have to do additional work with TESC to get his degree, so that was certain, anyways.
I suggested something crazy. Let's go straight back to NH! Jacob could finish school there, I could get back to teaching, and we could attend job training over the summer in AZ!
We didn't know for certain, but we kept the possibility of moving back earlier an option.
Jacob finally got better, but the days were still hard. I was still alone as Jacob woke up and studied until night. Once a week I would teach Bootcamp Fitness classes for BTB through Skype (an adventure for sure), but I didn't have a lot going on.
Back to the nunchucks.
After Christmas, it became apparent that moving back was the answer. We didn't know how we would considering the fact that we had nowhere to live in NH.
"Hey! There's an identical condo in the same condo block as mine for rent! We could be neighbors," my best friend casually mentioned as I told her of our struggle.
She sent pictures. I talked to the landlord over the phone.
We would move in at the beginning of February.
I was torn. The excitement of coming back to what I left unfinished in teaching martial arts was undeniable. My boss (and Sensei) was thrilled. I was stoked. But the idea of leaving Jacob's family was heartbreaking. I was closer to them than I could have ever imagined. This wasn't a choice I wanted to make, but Jacob and I trusted God.
The last weeks in NC were strange. We had to pack up and move to a different rental (living out of boxes in no fun) for the final month we would stay in state. However, this rental had no wi-fi. Considering Jacob's sudden need to complete more college classes, this wasn't an option.
Every day we would load up everything we would need for the day and spend the morning, afternoon, and evening at Jacob's parents- me working on BTB stuff and hanging out with the siblings, Jacob holed up doing schoolwork. To be honest, it was the best of times.
There was the Superbowl. Christmas lights. Gingerbread houses. The wintery, holidays months were the best with my extended family!
But finally the day came to leave for NH. It was rough. We packed up the car. The older siblings were leaving for classes before we would leave, so out we marched in the cold morning air to say goodbye as they pulled out of the driveway. It didn't really seem real.
Then came the goodbyes with Jacob's parents and younger siblings
After another unbroken trek to New England, we pulled into the wintery wonderland of NH around 12:30am and crashed my friend's adjacent apartment on a mound of blankets and pillows on the living room floor.
The next day was an early one. Meet the landlord. Sign the papers. Move in boxes. Pick up the mattresses. Get the (one) piece of furniture we owned.
Ah. Grown up life.
And isn't it nice when you can only afford to heat your apartment to 55 degrees when it's 19 degrees outside? Why do empty apartments always seem so bleak and terrifying? Why does foreign linoleum give me the creeps?
We went to BTB the night to surprise everyone. I felt out of sorts, but at the same time, I was home.
Goodnight, sweet dreams. Welcome to what will be the fastest 9 months of your life... starting now.
Getting back to teaching was a joy. Seeing Jacob start martial arts? Equally a joy. Seeing Jacob every day, from morning until we said goodnight? Also a joy, but also a gift.
Oh. And we got a kitten.
Plans. Big plans. Building up classes. Changing class schedules.
Jacob finishes school! Jacob tutors.
Why are we still broke? I don't think we can pay the bills. We can't afford toilet paper... I don't think.
Let's talk. Let's expand the dojo! Where? I don't know?
That didn't work. That also didn't work. THIS WILL WORK!
...that didn't work.
We found a building!
Be patient. Wait. Wait some more.
Jacob, you've been training a while now. You want to be an instructor?
Can we afford toilet paper yet?
We're opening up a second Beyond the Belt. Jacob, you want to run a dojo?
Summer classes. Long days, Hot nights. I wish we could afford air conditioning.
When can we buy a table so we don't have to eat on the floor?
Teaching from 3-8 is hard on 700 calories.
We got the building! Things are looking up!
Ah. I feel the luxury of buying sweet potatoes.
And just like that, we were opening a second Beyond the Belt. Jacob was going to be a head instructor. I got my Black Belt! And before we could blink, we had been married a whole year.
We are still building. We are still growing.
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| 04.18.14 |
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| 10.13.14 |
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| 10.13.15 |
But we haven't fought. Once. Well. We fight during martial arts classes but ;)
We are patient. We love each other. We are grateful for the time together.
We are protective. I still freak out when Jacob has to go somewhere without me because I'm sure he's going to get into a car accident and he'll die. The only way he can die is if we die together. Simultaneously. Oh, and painlessly if possible.
We're still not rich. Heck, we're still not middle class I don't think! But we are rich in ways no one else could understand.
We are working hard, 6 days a week. Days are long, responsibilities are highly adult-ish, and sometimes it feels like there is no way we are qualified.
But God is good. And this past year reminds me that no, I cannot do everything.
But God can do anything AND everything, and he is at the helm.
Thank you God for caring.
We love each other and we always, always love you.
